It's Just a Flesh Wound

According to Dick Kaegel of MLB.com, lovable and reliable ex-Yankee Kyle Farnsworth had a bit of an accident this morning after he was bitten on the hand by one of his two American bulldogs, either Rambo or Strike.

"I think it was Rambo," said Farnsworth. "I don't know. I reached in there and started grabbing dogs and throwing dogs. And one of them got me. One of those things that happens. It's never pretty. I've had to do it a few times and it's ugly."

I'd be more likely to put my money on Strike, as Farnsworth and strikes are often at odds with one another.

Luckily for Kyle, he was bitten on his left hand and the hard-throwing righty shouldn't miss any playing time.

"It hurts a little bit, but no big deal. Just a flesh wound," he said.

Don't Be Alarmed...

...because it looks like old Kyle Farnsworth has returned, just in time to renew his role as the setup man now that Joba's headed to the rotation. Excellent timing, Kyle. Ugh, God help us.

What's Gotten in to Kyle Farnsworth?

Who is this man...

...And what happened to the Kyle Farnsworth we all know and loathe?

Something is amiss here.

This cannot possibly be the same man who took it upon himself to introduce Paul Wilson to a face-full of Wrigley dirt.

...And it certainly isn't Jeremy Affeldt's worst nightmare, reincarnated.

This isn't even the Yankees' much maligned mop-up man incapable of pitching more than an inning a night, whose balky back would act up without notice. (Because look at how fragile that Farnsworth was!)

There must be some kind of mistake. Because the current Kyle Farnsworth has been...dare I say it?... reliable.

I'm not sure we Yankee fans are ready for a world in which Kyle Farnsworth pitches on back-to-back nights, no longer walks the ballpark, and posts a respectable 2.84 ERA.

And bakes delicious peanut butter cookies to help overcome his crippling shyness.

What?!

I am seriously alarmed now.

If only there were some kind of reasonable explanation for that smile, the hair, the glasses, and this new softer side of Kyle Farnsworth.

Wait, wait. What do we have here?

"Farnsworth is taking PR steps to improve it (his
public reputation). He recently hired Steve
Fortunato, a marketing consultant who
has worked with Damon, Alex Rodriguez and Bernie
Williams among others" (Feinsand, 2008)

Ah, that is enlightening. I was worried that someone mistakenly subjected him to a brain transplant when he spent the offseason in the hospital with a staph infection that almost cost him a leg.

But Kyle, do you really want the man in charge of your public persona to be the same one Alex Rodriguez uses? I'm not sure that's the best course of action.

Any day now, Farnsworth will be spotted sunbathing in Central Park, passing out at the birth of one of his children, wandering Toronto with an exotic dancer, and wondering if people dislike him because he's good-looking, biracial, and because he plays for the most popular team.

It should be fascinating to watch.

****************************************************

UPDATE:

For the record, this post was published a day before the same story appeared on Deadspin(which was weird, considering the article I referenced is two months old). Just sayin'.

Subway Series: Yankee Stadium Edition

There’s nothing better than a good, clean, well-pitched ballgame, except a good, clean, well-pitched ballgame in which the Yankees shut down the opposition and hold them to one measly little hit, especially when the opposition are their crosstown rivals who have prematurely been touted as “the best team in New York.” The Mets, without question, are having an incredible season thus far. However, facing some of the “big boys” of the American League has exposed quite a few weaknesses like their pitching staff, primarily the number three, four, and five starters. I was not at all pleased to have the Mets coming in having been absolutely pounded in Boston and having lost three games in a row for the first time all season, but then I remembered Moose was starting and that the Yankees are probably all a little sick of hearing about how great the Mets are and looking for a little respect, especially considering the Yankees have ten consecutive division titles and have been playing playoff-worthy baseball for much longer than just a few months.

It was very nice to watch another Moose vs. El Duque duel like the one last season while Duque was with the White Sox. They’re both such finesse pitchers that can throw an incredible arsenal of pitches, in any count and from any angle. I’d rather watch these kinds of guys, with pinpoint control and the ability to change speeds as dramatically as they both do, than some wild flamethrower that gets the ball up there around 100 but gives up monster homeruns and walk the guys they don’t strikeout. The Yankees caught a really bad break tonight when Moose had to come out of the game in the fourth inning with a no-hitter because of the rain delay and they had to go to the much maligned bullpen, but those guys did an incredible job and hopefully this shut out will give them all a little much-needed confidence. Villone did a great job giving them a little length, Proctor was trusted with the meat of the Mets lineup and looked sharp, Farnsworth did NOT give up a hit and looked like last season’s dominant and imposing reliever, and Mariano, the REAL Sandman and the best closer of all time, was, well, Mo. The first inning Giambi homerun turned out to be all the Bombers needed, but Andy Phillips’(Whom I affectionately call George, FYI) basehit in the 4th was a huge insurance run.

Taking a look around the league, Joe Girardi and the Marlins did tonight what Willie Randolph and the Mets couldn’t do in three games: beat the Red Sox. The Mets Fenway fiasco is, luckily for them, in the rearview mirror. However, the D-Train was able to hold the streaking BoSox to two runs and finally stopped Boston’s 12-game winning streak with a 5-2 victory. It’s about time!

Oh, and one last thing, going back to the Mets and Yankees. Why is it that the Yankees, according to the media at least, are inconsistent and struggling this year (45-32) while the Mets (47-32) are sometimes called the “best team in baseball”? Take a look at the records, and keep in mind the Yankees play in a division that is infinitely tougher than any N.L. Division, period. You don’t have to knock the Mets, but let’s give the Yanks a bit of respect, huh? I’m getting kind of sick of the Yankee-bashing.

This afternoon's game will be a match-up of Randy Johnson and Steve Trachsel. Hopefully, the Big Unit can continue pitching as well as he has of late and the Yankees can take the series and give their fans some bragging rights.

Lara*

Moose Dominates Again, Yankees Win Despite Nightmarish 8th Inning

Mike Mussina went 7 strong innings, allowing only 3 hits and 2 earned runs while striking out 5 and walking none. Moose threw 86 pitches and *62* of them were strikes!

Leaving the game one batter into the eighth with an 8-1 lead, I doubt anyone expected the Yankees to use three pitchers and see Mariano Rivera in the game with an opportunity to earn a save. But after an unbelievable inning, during which both Small and Farnsworth allowed 2 and 3 runs respectively while combining for only 1/3 of an inning each, that is exactly what happened. Rivera was shaky to say the least, hitting a batter and loading the bases while allowing 3 hits, but he eventually stopped the bleeding and the Yanks were out of the nightmare inning at last.

Anyone else have heart palpitations while watching that eighth inning? My Lord...

When it was all said and done, the Yankees won 8-7 over the Texas Rangers to remain in a first-place tie with the Red Sox. At 16-11, they are 5 games over .500 for the first time this season.

Friday night's game was the 450th start of Mike Mussina's career. Interestingly enough, only 7 pitchers in the history of baseball had amassed more wins at this point in their career than Moose. The pitchers? Tom Seaver, Bob Gibson, Juan Marichal, Jim Palmer, Randy Johnson, Roger Clemens, and Greg Maddux- Ever heard of any of those guys? Yeah, me neither (Insert sarcasm here).

Mussina is now 5-1. Giving up 2 ER in 7 innings, his ERA actually went up to 2.35. The Moose is tied for 1st place in the A.L. with his 5 victories, he is 2nd only to Curt Schilling in strikeouts, and 3rd in the league in ERA. Kind of unbelievable, really, how well the veteran pitchers in the game are doing at the minute. And Moose is certainly one of the guys leading the pack.